Improving Listening

Tips for Improving Listening and Conversation Skills

Tip 1: Ask Follow-Up Questions to keep the conversation moving forward and show that you are interested in what your conversation partner has to say.

➢ “What happened next?”

➢ “Why do you say that?”

➢ “How/When/Where did that happen?”

➢ “What did you say?”

Tip 2: Use Rejoinders such as that's too bad, that's great, or I'm sorry to hear that to

demonstrate to your conversation partner that you understood what they said and are

reacting to it. Rejoinders do not convey any new information, but they serve the important

function of keeping the conversation going.

➢ “Really?”

➢ “Wow, that’s amazing!”

➢ “Hmm…”

➢ “That must have been a great experience.”

➢ “Right”

➢ “True”

➢ “Incredible”

Tip 3: Use Positive Body Language to show your listener that you are paying attention to

what they have to say and are interested in talking to them.

➢ Look at the person

➢ Smile

➢ Maintain eye-contact

➢ Nod your head

➢ “What do you think about that?”

➢ “Did you like it?”

➢ “Do you enjoy working there?”

➢ “What’s your favorite part of the project?”

➢ “Fascinating!”

➢ “That’s so funny.”

➢ “That’s great.”

➢ “I’m sorry to hear that.”

➢ “That’s too bad.”

➢ “Oh no!”

➢ “That’s terrible!”

➢ Don’t cross your arms

➢ Don’t be distracted by your cell phone or

other electronic devices

Professional Etiquette Tips

In a corporate world, every action and every behavior is noticed. You need to be at the best of your professional behavior. Professional etiquette is something that you just cannot ignore. It adds to your overall personality and affects your profession especially when you go for client meetings, business development, sales pitch etc.

Some of the must have professional etiquettes are as follows:

Always listen to fellow members or clients in a meeting attentively.

A good listener is always appreciated.

Do not interrupt anyone. However, if you do so unintentionally, apologize and let the other person finish.

Do not be too aggressive while conversing.

Be strong in your communication but present it calmly.

Your tone should always be polite.

Maintain a good body language and eye contact.

While talking, look at everybody so that they feel you are not are not talking to just one person.

Keep your conversations short and to the point.

Do not make it speech-like. Try and avoid getting personal at anyone to avoid any sort of conflicts. Be reasonable in your arguments and politely beg to differ in case you do. Avoid harsh tone and polish your language. Maintain your sobriety and politeness. Avoid fidgeting of any sort and do not put your hands on the face while in a conversation.

Professional hand shakes should be firm. However, ensure your handshake is not so firm that it crushes or hurts the other person’s hand. Be confident while shaking hands and do not forget to smile.

Always wear neat and nicely pressed formal clothes during meetings. Choose sober colors like white, beige, blue, brown, black etc. Women should avoid wearing dresses that expose too much. Do not wear very heavy make-up. Be neat and clean. Make sure that you have well manicured nails. Do not wear jewellery that is too heavy or chunky.

You can wear heels for a good body posture. Maintain a good hair style and tie them up for a cleaner look. Wear clothes which you are comfortable in so that you can carry them well. This is very important while you are in a business meeting or client presentation. Men should also be neatly dressed. Always polish your shoes. Keep you nails and hair short. Wear a good belt and a tie.

When you are introduced to someone, stand up to meet or greet the person, shake hands or nod your head and smile. While having official dinner, offer the seat to your guests first, in some case, clients. Be punctual and thank the host for the dinner. Initiate conversations while waiting for the food. Avoid pointing the knife or fork towards the other person while eating and speaking. Learn basic table manners to dine with a potential client or an important business meet. Avoid talking when there is food in your mouth. Switch off or put your mobile phones in silent mode while in a meeting. In case it is an urgent call excuse yourself and take permission for taking the call.

Email Etiquette

Emails have become an important aspect in any organizational communication. However, there are many employees who belittle the importance of email communication and do not follow appropriate e-mail etiquettes. E-mails have become extremely important in today’s world of communication. Most of the business is conducted over the internet through e-mails. Employees need to be cautious while drafting e-mails to prospective clients. If a company or an organization is able to deal professionally through e-mails, they can be competitively smart and advanced. There are many aspects to proper and timely e-mail communication.

Why does one need email etiquette? To maintain efficiency, clear communication and professionalism in an organization. Also emails are important as they serve as evidence and can guard your company from costly law suits.

Using appropriate email communication can help your company to be professional in their approach. E-mails also increase efficiency as you can put your point forth more easily and in a much more effective manner.

One of the most important email etiquette is to be concise and to the point. Do not draft long unclear emails. Answer all the queries that a potential client has and pre-empt further questions. Use of grammar and punctuation should be perfect. Use correct spellings and do not use the SMS language. Address the email correctly to whomsoever concerned. You can use words like Dear Mr./Ms/Mrs.….Be professional in your language and do not make it sound personal. You can use templates for frequently used responses. Try and respond to e-mails faster. Answer the queries swiftly so that the client feels that he or she can trust you. The subject line of the e-mail is also important. Frame the sentence in the subject line clearly and concisely. Use proper structure & layout. Do not write in capital letters unless you want to highlight something.

Do not attach unnecessary files as it can become too much for a reader to read. Always remember to proof read your email before you send it across. Do not overuse the ‘high priority’ option and the ‘reply to all’ option. This will make the other person/team members feel that you are desperate or are trying to get attention. Remember to always add disclaimer and designation and contact details at the end of your email. This will make it easy for the receiver to contact you via phone if he or she wants to. Try and avoid any abbreviations. In case you are using any kind of abbreviations, mention the details in the bracket. Use active voice while drafting emails instead of passive.

Be cautious of the rich text option. Do not using large font size. Avoid using colorful font as well. Avoid long sentences as they can get confusing. Keep your text short and sweet. Keep your language gender neutral and avoid clarifying any kind of misunderstanding over e-mails. It is better to discuss sensitive and confidential issues over the phone or in person. Do not CC mails unnecessarily.

E-mails are no doubt a fast and a very effective means of communication however do remember the above tips to be effective at your email communication.

Dining Etiquette

One of the important aspects of personality development and personal grooming is dining etiquette. When it comes to business meetings and conferences, you do not want to have poor dining etiquettes especially when there is a risk of losing a potential client. Unfortunately, there are many people that do not pay attention to dining etiquettes but sometimes, it is these impressive manners that can win you a client and/or a contract. Here are some of the dining etiquette tips that can help you to make a better impression the next time you are asked to a formal dinner.

Take small bites and do not open your mouth and chew your food. Often when attending a business dinner, you will be talking to those around you. Make sure that you do not talk with food in the mouth. . No one wants to see an individual who chews with his or her mouth open. Finish you morsel, swallow it, and pat your table napkin on your mouth and then talk. Smaller bites allow you to chew through your food faster, allowing you to talk to anyone quickly.

Also, do not eat with your hands. For some reason, people still pick food items with their hands. This should be avoided especially when you are in a business setting. Try and pick those food items that so not require you to use your hands. Choose items that you can easily cut with your knife and pick with a fork. Even when you are using a finger bowl, do not put both your hands in it. Only dip one hand at a time. Gently pick up your table napkin and wipe your hands with it.

In case you need to pick an emergency call while dining, please take permission from people sitting with you and excuse yourself to go out of the restaurant to talk. When you come back after the call, do apologize to people that you are dining with and then get involved with the discussion in the meeting again.

Don’t put your elbows on the dinner table. There are so many business professionals that do that! The act of resting your elbows on the table is generally a sign that you are tired and/or bored. This is surely not the impression you want to give others while you are attending a formal dinner. Hence remember to not rest your elbows on the table the next time you go for a formal dinner! As far as drinking is concerned, at most you should have two drinks during a business function because you are still accountable for your words and actions and you have to remain decent and professional. You should drink less or avoid drinking especially when conducting business over a meal. For people who do not consume alcohol, order some juice to give company to people who are drinking. Not ordering anything is a sign that you are not comfortable in that setting and gives an impression that you do not mingle with people that easily. All said and done, dining etiquette should not restrict you from enjoying your meal and relaxing!

Phone Etiquette

In the world of fast communication, be it the internet, cell phone or messaging, maintaining certain etiquettes is important. Phone etiquette involves certain dos and don’ts that must be adhered to while talking to someone especially in the corporate or business arena. First and foremost, is to be courteous and sophisticated. Most people do not realize the fact that their voice can reveal a lot of their personality even if they are not in conversation face to face. However, your voice and the choice of words that you use while talking to people over the phone must be kind, polite, clear and sophisticated.

Remember that before you begin your conversation introduce yourself incase you are talking to that person for the first time. Remember to do this even when you have met the person formally but are talking over the phone for the first time as he or she may not recognize your voice. Also, before you begin the topic of your discussion, take permission of the other person online whether it is the right time to talk to them or not. Phone calls generally should not be made before nine in the morning or after eight or nine at night. Try to avoid lunch timings as well. One should always check the number before dialing. Be certain of the number you are dialing to avoid disturbing somebody else unnecessarily. In case if you do reach a wrong number, please apologize and say that you probably dialed the wrong number before hanging up.

While you are on the phone, keep the subject matter short and concise especially if it is a business related call. Generally, people like to keep it short over the phone, hence be sure that you are able to explain the subject matter or convey the message shortly.

In case you are using a cell phone and are at a public place, keep your volume low but make sure that you do not make it very low such that the other person cannot hear you. In case you are using your cell phone for business use as well, make sure that you choose your caller tune wisely. This may appear trivial but it does contribute to who you are especially to prospective clients.

Even if you know who is calling you, the correct way to answer the phone is saying ‘hello’. You may later add the name of the person who is calling you but ‘Yes Mr./Miss/Mrs.… sounds a little out of place initially in a corporate scenario. Phone etiquettes involve using kind phrases like "Just a moment, please.", “Kindly be online”, Can I put you on hold?”, “May I have your name please?”, “Sorry to keep you waiting” etc. In case if your phone is busy, send an SMS immediately after ending the call or call back the person soon.

Last but not the least, it is important that you do not slam the receiver down or disconnect the call abruptly. You must make sure that the conversation has ended and possibly so by conveying it to the other person. When you need to end the conversation and hang up, do so gently.

Social Etiquette

Man is a social animal and rightfully so he or she must follow certain social etiquettes that are appreciated by one and all. Everyone wants to be socially accepted and hence all of us want to engage in social conversations. But many of us either become nervous, shy or find ourselves paralyzed in front of a large group of people. Due to this, we curl inwards and do not make any conversations with people. In yet another scenario, there are times when people do not realize of their inappropriate behavior in social circuit. Social etiquette tips help us to be correct with our mannerisms, communication and our behavior in general.

While conversing with a group of people, you need to be polite, humble and sophisticated. Also, use language effectively and do not forget saying basic polite words like thank you, please, welcome, sorry etc wherever necessary. When a group of people are talking, always allow others to talk and only when they finish, make your point. In case you interrupt someone by mistake, apologize and request him or her to complete their conversation.

Always ask relevant and appropriate questions. It is assumed that you are socially aware and hence asking questions that reveal that you do not know about a common topic in news may not make a good impression about you. Hence, read newspapers regularly and keep yourself aware of what I happening socially and in the world in general. In case if there is an awkward silence that you may want to avoid, comment on the ambience of the place, on music that may be playing or on weather in general just to keep the conversation going. Remember to not pass any personal remarks on anybody you avoid any displeasure in the group. Also, do not pass any mean or sarcastic comments on people.

While you are conversing about something, remember to keep in short as nobody is interested in boring conversations. Always give chance to other people to talk as they may also want to make a point. If you have a long, in-depth conversation some people may not be interested as they would want to meet other people in the gathering too. Remember that social etiquette conversations are pleasant and short.

While conversing with people make an eye contact with everyone. Making everyone feel involved in a conversation is an art in itself. Your body language should also be polite and respectful. Also, remember personal hygiene is also an important part of social etiquette. Always carry a handkerchief with you. Smell good and present yourself well by dressing appropriately. Table manners should also be taken care of as they too form an important part of social etiquettes. Also remember to introduce yourself or get introduced before you begin a conversation with a stranger. Hand shakes are usually considered formal and polite when greeting people at a social gathering.

Social etiquette is important because it creates an impression about your personality that in turn affects the perception and treatment of other people towards you.

Work-Life Balance

Almost everyone around the world, who is working, feels the pressure at work place and often complains about not getting personal time for one-self. Work-life balance, as the name suggests, is devoting number of hours to a task or an activity judiciously such that you make some time for personal enrichment and leisurely activities. Work timings should be sincerely followed but one should learn to be effective at work place such that you can finish you work on time and keep some hours in a day for your physical and mental well-being.

Many people, especially those who are workaholics, find it difficult to achieve this work life balance. They devote so many hours to their work that they find no time for themselves. This affects health in the long run. Putting in many hours at work leads to stress and deteriorates the ability to concentrate. This can slow you down. Hence it is always advisable to work hard but to give equal time to unwind and relax.

It may be difficult to achieve the right kind of balance between work and personal life and it may differ on a daily basis but it is important to plan your day in advance so that you know you can devote at least 2 – 4 hours in a day for family and personal well-being. Many people prefer to join a gym for maintain their health. This can be a great stress buster. It is also important to make some time for your family. Take a break and go for a holiday at least once in a year. Do not carry for work there and soak in the beautiful moment that life offers.

You must remember that every minute, every day will not come back again. Sacrificing on your enjoyment and concentrating too much on achievement will not make you a satisfied person. After all, you do not want to die with any regrets in life. Hence maintaining a healthy balance is important.

Indulge in your hobbies that most of us give up upon after joining work. Activities like painting, singing, reading, gardening, dancing can really help you to combat the work pressure and the stress that you have accumulated at office. Yoga and meditation are also effective in maintaining your mental equilibrium and keeping those energy levels intact.

Watch movies, go for lavish dinners, meet old friends, pamper yourself in a spa, go for a swim, decorate your house, buy some flowers, indulge in pleasurable cooking and alike. All these activities make you feel happy. This in fact can increase your productivity because happiness often gives you a kick and raises your energy levels. Even when you are at work take small breaks that help to concentrate better. In case you have to work on weekends, make sure you take a leave to unwind your self.

Sometimes, not thinking about work and sitting silently in the house can also be a refreshing change. With tablets, laptops and mobile phones everywhere, most people carry work even at home. Most people feel that there is so much competition at workplace they cannot afford to take a break. This mindset is a myth. Everyone should take a break. In fact, these breaks will actually increase your productivity and help you concentrate better. You will be able to strategize and come up with new ideas. Hence, an ideal employee/employer/businessman is the one who knows the tricks of balancing work and personal life.

Time Management

We have heard so much about time management time and again. It is basically the act or process of exercising conscious control over the amount of time spent on specific activities, especially to increase efficiency or productivity. You can do time management either by a range of skills, tools, or by using techniques to manage time when accomplishing specific tasks, projects and goals.

Initially, time management referred to just business or work activities, but eventually the term broadened to include personal activities as well. A time management system is a designed combination of processes, tools, techniques, and methods. To manage any activity you need special time management. Many people can’t manage their time and thus are put on the hanging line in a work scenario.

Ask yourself how you spend your time each day? If you are a student then you can distribute your time in a manner that your study time and breaks can be co-adjusted accordingly. Jot down one best time block you can study. How long is it? What makes for a good break for you? Can you control the activity and return to your studies? Answer these questions for yourself and you will be able to manage time really well. Also dedicate a study space. Determine for yourself a place that is free from distraction where your concentration is highest.

Dedicated study spaces

The Chinese follow a certain way of time management. They first talk about launching the project. Then by starting they say that you may realize that there are some things you have not planned for in your process. Details of an assignment are not always evident until you begin the assignment. They also believe that perfection is the enemy of good, especially when it prevents you from starting.

Identify resources that will help you. Remove distractions from the foreground. Maintain your cool and be passionate about the work. Be as specific about your work as possible. Take breaks that are meaningful so that when you return to work you are fresh and upto working. Review what you have done till now.

Create a simple To Do list. This simple thing will help you identify a few items, the reason for doing them, a timeline for getting them done, and then printing this simple list and posting it for reminders. Make a planner and then write down appointments, classes, and meetings on a chronological log book or chart. Check what’s ahead for the day and always go to sleep knowing you’re prepared for tomorrow. This will help you manage time like nothing else

Stress Management

BY SUSHANT

All of us are living a fast paced demanding life, dealing with work pressure, home responsibilities, and other commitments all the time. We all live and deal with stress at some point or the other. Sometimes, this stress becomes a part and parcel of our life. However, managing stress is extremely important. Stress has a lot of harmful effects on our body and mind. People under stress often experience headaches, anxiety, depression, negative thoughts, nausea, anger, frustration etc. Hence to avoid these problems, maintaining stress is extremely important. You may feel that there is not much that I can do about stress however that is not quite true. You need to exercise regularly to keep stress at bay. Exercising is not the only thing that will help. One needs a change in ones routine and you need to inculcate a sense of positivity. You need to take charge of your thoughts, feelings and actions.

It is said that yoga, medication and breathing exercises are great ways to combat stress. The ultimate goal to manage stress is to lead a balanced life. Work is not everything in life. You need to make some time for recreation and leisurely activities that can calm and soothe your mind.

Some people say that you can manage stress by keeping a journal. Every time you get stressed, just note down in your dairy what caused you that stress. In this way you can identify the things and the people that stress you. Once you see this journal after some days you will realize that there are some common things that stress you. Identifying these things is half the job done. Now, note down your reaction and response to things that stressed you out. You will realize that an alternate peaceful action would have caused less stress. Write down that alternate action and what you can do to make yourself feel better whenever such situations arise.

One of the worse ways to deal with stress is to smoke and consume large amounts of alcohol. Also, avoid eating or sleeping too much when you are stressed because this will make you lethargic. Avoid sitting in front of the TV for many hours. Instead, choose healthier ways to manage your stress. First and foremost, you need to organize and plan your life to keep unnecessary stress away. For example, plan your day in advance – schedule meetings and be punctual for them, reach home on time from work, do not waste time gossiping etc. Always keep a to-do list with you to know what is it that is pending and how much can be achieved in a day. One thing that needs to be kept in mind is the fact that while preparing this to do list, be realistic and set achievable targets so that there is no stress. Learn to say no to certain things. As a human being, there is only so much that you can do. Do not expect too much out of yourself. Relax, rejuvenate and recharge yourself so that you can function more efficiently.

Managing Conflicts

Conflict is a condition where there is opposition, disagreement and/or antagonism between two or more people. This may be due to lack of communication, differences over certain issues and/or contradiction in ideas, beliefs and thoughts. People experience tensions, cold vibes, power struggle, strife etc when conflicts arise. Conflicts at workplace can hamper the progress of your work and in turn stunts the growth of the organization. Conflicts act as barriers to healthy organizational development. Sometimes, however, how hard we try; we end up with conflicting thoughts with team members. Therefore it is necessary to manage conflicts in a way such that it has minimum impact on our lives.

Unresolved conflicts can be hazardous especially at work places. They can lead to inappropriate behavior such as avoidance, inability to work in teams, verbal assaults, and overall resentment. In worst cases, some of the employees in the organization become so hostile that they eventually have to quit their work and separate from the organization.

So how do you smartly manage conflicts? The biggest word is communication. Communicate your thoughts, ideas and beliefs openly but do not expect everyone to agree with you. Hence, be open to debate, discussion and differences. You must remember that this discussion is for the betterment of the project or the job assigned to you and your team members. Hence, do not get personal and avoid animosity with the person. Another point to remember is to control your anger. Use words like ‘I understand’, ‘I somewhat agree with you’, ‘what you are saying is fine but…,’ and then put forth your point. This will make things better and will lead to a healthy discussion avoiding any scope for conflicts.

Do not try to resolve conflicts over non-personal communication modes like e-mails, answering machine messages, and notes. At times, this can worsen the condition. Communicate in person or at least over the phone.

Listen to what the other person has to say. If you can listen and respond appropriately you will bring peace and solutions to the conflict easily. For example, you have a meeting with you team members and your boss over a new product launch and you have said that winter is the perfect time to launch the product but your colleague does not think so. Give him a chance to speak and politely ask him the reasons of why he or she thinks so and what the alternate strategies are then. If you agree to his/her point accept so humbly. If you do not agree, reason out the things why you do not agree and substantiate with examples. Ask for an opinion from other team members and let the head/boss decide.

Controlling your anger and frustration is the biggest challenge while managing conflicts. Sometimes, it is better to be silent and let some time pass by so that you can look at things more objectively. Managing conflicts in no one means being subservient and agreeing to whatever people around have to say just so that you want to avoid conflicts.

Putting forth your point and what you think is extremely important. Healthy communication is essential. Also, one should learn to keep ones ego aside. Keep no room for any kind of attitude problems. Be humble, intelligent and a great communicator and the rest will fall in place!

Face all Challenges

We all go through tough and challenging times. But how we face those challenges and deal with it is what makes our life. As we grow up, life throws many challenges at us. As a student, every exam is a challenge, building career and succeeding in life is a challenge, learning from failures is a challenge, overcoming personal loss is a challenge, maintaining work and family is also a challenge. Hence, the key to face all these different challenges in life, we need to maintain a positive attitude and a never say die spirit. Mentally, our thoughts, beliefs and ideas make a tremendous impact on our behavior and our actions. If we think positive, we experience peace and well-being. Negative thoughts pull us down and tend to make us feel sad and depressed.

One of the most common questions that people ask when they are going through tough times is that ‘why me?’ The answer to this question is that you are not the only one who is going through challenging times. Everyone has their own share of problems. Some may have financial problems, others have work related problems and some others may have some personal problems. All of us face challenges of different sorts. Some show it while others don’t. However, to develop the right attitude to face these challenges is what is important.

Developing a strong mind and maintaining your emotional quotient (EQ), helps us in facing any kind of challenges. There is no denying to the fact that it is difficult to come to terms with some of the difficult problems that we go through. People detected of cancer and undergoing treatment must be going through such challenging times. During times like these, one needs support of their friends and family members who give you courage to face such difficult times.

It is said that spirituality and meditation also help a great deal in understanding the deeper meaning of life and thus being able to face challenges. Deep breathing, meditation and exercises help us to relieve our stress and become strong mentally as well as physically. Self healing is important. This happens through positive thinking and peace of mind.

Another way to face challenges is to have our support system in place. Build strong relationships. Friends can help you to overcome your problems and having their support makes life easy. Family members can also provide encouragement and motivation to face any kind of a challenge.

Learn not just through our own experiences but also through others experiences. The experiences we encounter in life make us stronger Learn from problems so that you will not have to experience it again. Remember that when we face a challenge, the best way to deal with it is to conquer it and learn from it.

Last but not the least, expect the unexpected from life and you will find that you are strong enough to fight any difficulty in life. Build that never say die spirit and you will see that life is too beautiful even with difficult times and tough challenges.

Fight Negative Thoughts

As human beings we are constantly dealing with negative thoughts such as anger, irritation, stress, frustration, fear, guilt, regret, sadness, disappointment etc. Negative thoughts can not only harm our mental equilibrium but can also affect our physical well being. We deal with negative thoughts in our daily life when we shout at someone, deal with people who irritate us or hurt us and sometimes we just develop negative thoughts by sitting idle and thinking or imagining. Negative thoughts and feelings are one the worst things we can experience as a human being. But at the same time it is not possible to remain positive at all points. Negative thoughts can creep in our minds and can disturb you. But this is where the power of positive thinking helps. Try to avoid negative thoughts and rather than ignoring it, deal with it. Face the fear and do not worry in anticipation of things.

We need to learn to detach our negative thoughts and emotions and think like an outsider. Since we think about hundreds of thoughts per day, some of them can affect how we feel. The biggest one being fear – fear of losing, fear of failing, fear of being lonely etc. Our mind sucks us into a whirlpool of negative thoughts and we lose our mental peace and balance of life. We become irrational and lose the control over our emotions.

There are some people who are constantly analyzing their feelings. They need to stop doing this as this will always cause you to have negative emotions. Negative thinking will cause tension in your body, and your subconscious will stop working. Negative thoughts also stem from thinking about what others think of you. People put pressure on their self and try to become something that they are not only because they have a perception of what others think of them. This not only leads to negativity but builds so much pressure! What others think of you is none of your concern. Every individual is unique and you must remain true to your self.

If you want to get rid of negative thoughts, do not fight your mind and body. You need to be in harmony and in peace with your body and thoughts. Just let the thoughts come as if you do not have total control over them. Your thoughts should be aligned. When a negative situation comes up, let it be. Do not mull over it. Do not fight it or constantly think about it and get worried. Accept that there are some things which are beyond your control. Hence what you are thinking inside your mind will not change the situation. In fact it will only hamper your mind without solving the problem. When any negative thoughts come to your mind, just prepare yourself mentally, become aware of it, and most importantly, become conscious of it through mind, body and soul.

Negative emotions are not something which you can delete or erase. You need to learn to deal with them such that they do not affect or harm you in any way. Acceptance and assimilation are two key words. Even negative emotions can teach you so much – so the key is to learn even from your negative thoughts and pick up positive traits in them.

Power of Positive Thinking

We all keep hearing about the power of positive thinking and how it can change our life, but must of us find it difficult to bring about that change of positivity and optimism in our life. Positive thinking should be a way of life not a compulsive habit. We cannot treat positive thinking like a subject which needs to be learned. Of course you need to learn to be positive but it should not be treated like a subject one learns in school. Our mental being affects our physical health and positive changes can thus bring about changes in our physical health too! The power of positive thinking is immense. Consciously and unconsciously it helps us to be stress free. Positive thinking has a lot of influence in improving our lives.

So how should one bring about the effective change of positive thinking? Positive thinking is our ability to use our thoughts to imagine and anticipate the best possible outcome in every circumstance. As human beings most of our worries stem from things we anticipate and more often than not this anticipation is expecting the worst possible outcome. This is what needs to be changed. For example, if a student has worked hard for his or her exams and is anticipating his/her results, he/she must anticipate good results. Avoid thinking about grades and marks. A positive student will think that because he/she has worked hard he/she will get good grades. Negativity can create irritation and anxiety – both of which are harmful for your mind and body. Think positive and life will be very beautiful!

The power of positive thinking works best for self enhancement and personality development. Everyone wants to be associated with a positive person around. We our attitude becomes positive we attract people around us. It improves our present condition and leads to a constructive path of life. Positive attitude helps us visualize favorable circumstances. If we aim for self enhancement for our own personal progress, we must consider our strengths, good qualities and positive abilities and we must be confident that we can achieve our goals and conquer what life offers us. We must give importance to the positive character traits we have and enhance it further to emerge as a stronger positive person. Even in an organizational set up, positive thinking can help a great deal. People assuming the leadership roles must be positive and spread optimism amongst the employees. Positive thinking can be a great motivational factor in getting things done.

Here are some of the positive changes that you can adapt to, to realize the power of positive thinking: In every situation, look for positive people to be associated it. Be a happy person, always. Every day when you wake up, chose to be joyful and pleasant. Be positive in your outlook in life. Spread happiness. Never ever let negative emotions affect you. Think positively and good things will happen. If you believe you will succeed, then you will succeed and this quintessentially is the power of positive thinking.

Motivate Yourself

BY SUSHANT

We lead a very busy life and it’s almost a struggle to remain motivated enough for life or for smaller things. The drive is a constant one and is almost every time assaulted by negative thoughts and anxiety about the future. It’s not uncommon to face doubt and depression. But something that keeps one going is the ability to keep moving forward.

We have to understand our thoughts and the relation they share with our emotions to able to stay motivated. It’s of utmost importance to understand how to nurture motivating thoughts, neutralize negative ones and to focus on the task at hand. Thinking about future is necessary but of present is of no less value.

We often lose motivation because of reasons like lack of confidence in oneself, lack of clear focus and lack of proper direction. These three things when combined together become lethal for the motivation quotient that one has. For motivating yourself you have to keep track of all three things and overcome the disabilities that it creates in the mind.

You can motivate yourself firstly by growing confidence in yourself. Forget your past failures, bad breaks and personal weaknesses that dominate your mind. Never become jealous of your competitors, instead try laddering up the scale. You should always avoid making excuses for why you can’t succeed. Focus should always be on gratitude. Set aside time to focus on everything positive in your life. Make a proper mental list of your strengths, past successes and present advantages. We often tend to take our strengths for granted and dwell on our failures but instead make way for positivity in life. This will inadvertently rejuvenate your confidence and get you motivated so as to build on to your current success.

Fear based thinking will take you nowhere and if you dwell on this then you have no escape. Make your life a goal oriented one. Once you define a goal, you automatically focus your energy on that. Fear nothing and before it gets on to your head try planning out something that can evade that situation. That way, it makes you feel in control and motivates you in doles. Also, your brain atleast has something to do instead of lazing out and fearing defeat.

Motivate yourself by giving your raw thoughts a direction. Your plans and strategies are of no use unless you give them a sense of direction. Identify the activities that lead to success. For every goal, there are activities that pay off and those that don’t. Make a list of all such things. Do all this and you can motivate yourself to wonder and amazement of yourself.

Fight Negative Thoughts

As human beings we are constantly dealing with negative thoughts such as anger, irritation, stress, frustration, fear, guilt, regret, sadness, disappointment etc. Negative thoughts can not only harm our mental equilibrium but can also affect our physical well being. We deal with negative thoughts in our daily life when we shout at someone, deal with people who irritate us or hurt us and sometimes we just develop negative thoughts by sitting idle and thinking or imagining. Negative thoughts and feelings are one the worst things we can experience as a human being. But at the same time it is not possible to remain positive at all points. Negative thoughts can creep in our minds and can disturb you. But this is where the power of positive thinking helps. Try to avoid negative thoughts and rather than ignoring it, deal with it. Face the fear and do not worry in anticipation of things.

We need to learn to detach our negative thoughts and emotions and think like an outsider. Since we think about hundreds of thoughts per day, some of them can affect how we feel. The biggest one being fear – fear of losing, fear of failing, fear of being lonely etc. Our mind sucks us into a whirlpool of negative thoughts and we lose our mental peace and balance of life. We become irrational and lose the control over our emotions.

There are some people who are constantly analyzing their feelings. They need to stop doing this as this will always cause you to have negative emotions. Negative thinking will cause tension in your body, and your subconscious will stop working. Negative thoughts also stem from thinking about what others think of you. People put pressure on their self and try to become something that they are not only because they have a perception of what others think of them. This not only leads to negativity but builds so much pressure! What others think of you is none of your concern. Every individual is unique and you must remain true to your self.

If you want to get rid of negative thoughts, do not fight your mind and body. You need to be in harmony and in peace with your body and thoughts. Just let the thoughts come as if you do not have total control over them. Your thoughts should be aligned. When a negative situation comes up, let it be. Do not mull over it. Do not fight it or constantly think about it and get worried. Accept that there are some things which are beyond your control. Hence what you are thinking inside your mind will not change the situation. In fact it will only hamper your mind without solving the problem. When any negative thoughts come to your mind, just prepare yourself mentally, become aware of it, and most importantly, become conscious of it through mind, body and soul.

Negative emotions are not something which you can delete or erase. You need to learn to deal with them such that they do not affect or harm you in any way. Acceptance and assimilation are two key words. Even negative emotions can teach you so much – so the key is to learn even from your negative thoughts and pick up positive traits in them.

Inner Peace

The term ‘inner peace’, also referred to as ‘peace of mind’ is to be able to be in a state that is quiet, stable, calm, stress-free and happy. Maintaining inner peace in a hectic fast paced life may not be easy but we must all strive to achieved inner peace for a healthy state of being. Mentally and physically, most of us are always stressed. This not only harms our physical being but makes us mentally unstable. We lack concentration and become irritated. Inner peace which can be achieved through meditation and breathing exercises help you to calm your mind and increase concentration.

Finding inner peace is also more often than not associated with religion especially Buddhism and Hinduism. They lay a lot of importance on mental equilibrium and maintaining inner peace. According to Buddhism, a calm person is more close to God that someone who is mentally stresses, frustrated or irritated. It may not be possible to achieve a calm state of being in a few days especially if you are use to a lifestyle that is fast, stressful and complex. However, achieving inner peace is a matter of change in your thoughts and feelings. Maintaining harmony within comes from the mind. You have to talk to your mind that it cannot stress itself. Whenever you feel angry or irritated, remember two words ‘inner peace’ and take a deep breath. It will automatically make you feel light.

Create harmony with things that are bothering you. For example, you may be bothered by the fact that your maid does not clean your house the way you want it. Talk to your maid, explain it to him/her about the cleaning aspect, and find out what the problem is. However, things like these and even bigger problems in life should not affect your inner peace. Many people keep fighting with things that is causing them stress and anxiety. What they perhaps do not realize is the fact that if you fight, it will fight you back.

Once you make a pact with your mind and heart to keep worries at bay and create equilibrium within, things get very easy; Most of the people feel that things they use to worry about were actually quite frivolous. It was just their nature to get hyper, worried and stressed. As soon as people start practicing small changes in their life, meditation and change in thoughts and actions, they realize that they are one step closer to attainting inner peace.

Change is constant but changing yourself and your habits may not be that easy. It should be a step by step process. Start getting up early in the morning and practicing meditation and breathing exercises. Try to avoid rush for anything. Be punctual and avoid any sort of laziness. Make ample time for rest and leisurely activities. Spending quality time with oneself is very important. Spend one hour with yourself daily where you are free from mobile phone, laptop or any sort of communication device. Develop faith, and persistence which are all functions of the mind. Imagine a peaceful life and keep expectations to a minimum. Stay happy, help others, let go and spread joy and you will automatically know what inner peace is!

Spiritual Growth and Development

BY SUSHANT

Spiritual growth is the process of evolving your inner self, your consciousness. It is a method through which you awaken the soul within through meditation and feel the energetic vibrations within. Spiritual growth and development helps you know more about yourself.

When we grow spiritually our perception changes and the way we see the world around us also changes. Spiritual growth and development brings about a positive change in our life. Not only we become optimistic and positive in life but also become calmer and peaceful. This growth helps us to deal with negativity around us. We reflect upon life and look for deeper meanings. Anger and other negative emotions take a back seat and we start feeling happy and comfortable in any circumstances.

As we grow spiritually, our attitude toward life also changes for the better in a number of ways. Most of our problems stem from our own perceptions and expectations of ourselves and of the world. Spirituality and inner engineering may not help you to change the world but it definitely helps you to change the way you perceive the world. One will realize that this solves half the problems of your life. Someone has aptly put it that spiritual journey makes you see the world with a new pair of glasses!

Spiritual growth and development helps you to imbibe humility. As we embark on a spiritual journey, pride, jealously, selfishness starts to melt away. You start becoming humble, generous and nonviolent. Every experience in our life can teach us something if we have a humble approach towards life. When we are spiritually inclined we can keep stress at bay and spread the message of love and peace around. We realize that our equations with people around us change. We value relationships and there is also a tendency of helping others.

Spirituality helps us to develop detachment, which leads to inner peace. We learn to rise above frustration and disappointment. Meditation, a part of spiritual growth and development not just has physical health benefits but also increases our concentration and sharpens our mind. People, who are spiritually inclined, lead a balanced lifestyle. A holistic approach towards our life and our overall mental and physical being comes into play as we start to realize that everything is related to our spiritual growth.

Spiritual growth is also characterized by a growing connection with God and hence prayers play an important part in spiritual growth and development. Chanting ancient scriptures also helps us to achieve peace which most of us miss in our busy stressful lives. Spiritual growth and development helps us develop a deep understanding of who we really are and how we can grow internally. Our inner power and strength increases tremendously.

Spirituality and inner peace is a way of life. It helps you to develop great strength and courage. It builds our endurance levels and we can take a complete charge of our life thereby living a life that has no regrets, no guilt and/or no anger. Spiritual growth and development can help to make human beings better citizens.

Need for Personal Growth

BY SUSHANT

Don’t we keep discussing and debating on how important is personal growth for us as an individual? But do we really know what personal growth is? We always try to associate monetary upscale as a personal growth but trust me the term personal growth encompasses much more than you can think and definitely more than just a rise in economic ladder.

Look at the world around you and you will see we are all personally undeveloped people and why do I say that? Everywhere you will see you will find violence, prejudice, illness and hatred and what does all this denote? It is time for us to spare time for ourselves and sit and think. We must ask ourselves why this happening is. What can we do to change this negativity? Could this be the reason why we need personal growth? Then is it possible that we can do something about it?

We need personal growth on our lives because the only person you can change is yourself, and who knows, maybe that change can affect everybody around you. However much you try you can not change other people, they might change after getting influenced by you but that is something that you think because if they change it will be because they feel it is high time. You may be a bit skeptical about this idea but there is proof. This proof is from a scientific study known as Quantum Physics and The Law of Attraction. So the question why we need personal growth can be answered by the Law of Attraction. Actually the laws of Quantum Physics prove that all things are made of energy. Hence, your desires and thoughts are just energy. They are non-physical realities that are not yet visible in the physical world.

Since our thoughts and desires are simply energy, this means that whatever you focus your thoughts on makes your reality. But when you focus on thinking about the things that you are afraid of, the things that you dislike or you do not want, you create and attract more of the negative in your life. However, when you focus your thoughts on the things that you want or you desire, you attract much of it in abundance. This is where personal growth plays a part.

When you think about good things, that energy attracts the same kind of energy. If your mind is focused on something that is positive and happy, you attract other people who are also positive and happy. Then the people around you, who are miserable or unsuccessful will either move away or change their thoughts into a more positive one. This is exactly why we need personal growth.

Role of Emotions

Emotions are nothing but the feelings that we experience within us such as happiness, loneliness, anger, pride, anxiety, regret, shame, guilt, excitement, love, etc depending on our experiences and the stimuli we receive from our surroundings and people around. Every individual has a unique perception of the event and every individual feels it differently. That is the reason why some people are considered to be more emotional than others.

Our emotions are the primary influencing factor for every definitive action that we make as a human being. We experience emotions right from the time we are born. Gradually as we grow up, we tend to understand the world around us in a better way and also develop a better understanding of our own emotions. Emotions are the key part of our life and they affect our overall being and behavior. As humans, we are constantly experiencing different types of emotions be it anger, sadness, happiness, guilt or anything else. The role of emotions dictates our actions more often than not. Hence, getting a complete hold of your emotions is very necessary to lead a stable life. The role of emotions in motivating behavior is also an important aspect of understanding our addictions. Without emotions, addiction does not exist. Without that intense need addiction does not exist.

We, human beings, are living in a close knit society where our behavior and action is determined by our past experiences. Some of the emotions like fear, anger, love and grief are so strong that they force us to things which one would not even think of doing otherwise. On the other hand, many people even being successful or getting old have a good grip on their emotions.

There are many times when so many of us experience strong emotions. These strong and intense emotions are good but it is bad to let them overpower you. Most of us knowingly or unknowingly come in the control of these intense emotions. In the situations like these our body secrets a lot of hormones which makes it difficult for our brain to take any decisions. During such times, our decisions become biased and we base them upon our past experiences. When intense emotions surround us, we get into depression and then we become dangerous not just for our own self but also for others. For example, when we are angry we do not realize how our behavior is hurting others and harming our own body. In psychological sense, this is a state where we have no control on emotions and thus our brain weakens in controlling emotions.

To come out of such situations we need to exert a certain control over our emotions. We need to be strong to face any emotional imbalance or disturbance. For this we need to understand emotions and its role in our life. We need to realize that up to what extent we can get a control of our emotions. People who commit suicide have no control over their emotions. They never realize that they are a victim of their own emotions. We need a brain and a heart strong enough so that no emotion can take control of us. This can be achieved by cultivating hobbies, doing things that please us, inculcating a sense of optimism and positivity around and practicing breathing exercises and meditation.

Emotion Intelligence as it relates to Personality Development

BY SUSHANT

You personality has a profound effect on your day to day life. Personality development can make your life easier – especially if some consideration is given to emotional intelligence. Emotion intelligence governs how we read people, how they read us and our reaction to specific events that occur. Your emotional intelligence can be enhanced. Personality development is one such way that this can be accomplished. Coming to terms with how your personality takes control of your life via subconscious cues is one way that you can start to learn to have some control over it.

Emotional intelligence may be affected by a traumatic experience or improper emotional conditioning during childhood. Exploring the issue may help overcome any hindrance that a person have in regards to a specific circumstance or event. For example, if someone who has just lost a loved one talks to you about it and you start telling jokes at their expense – this can be indicative of a low emotional intelligence on your behalf. You have obviously misread the severity of the situation and you have also not adequately judged what their likely reaction will be. Personality development can help you discover why you have reacted this way and introduce steps to overcome this.

While it may be debatable how closely linked personality and emotional intelligence are – it can’t be denied that personality has some effect on how our emotions take hold of our being. It will be harder for someone who is fairly resilient to stress and depression to be mired down with their own problems. Having the will to power through rough times and not becoming depressed about insignificant issues shows a tremendous strength in regards to personality and emotions. Personality development can still help such people reach their full potential. For those of us who are easily upset then it is probably going to have a dramatic change in our emotional intelligence.